Do You Know What I Mean?—Discovering Your Personal Communication Style was published one year ago. I’ve enjoyed having contact with many new people as a result of publishing this book and gotten a lot of worthwhile, positive feedback—all of which is gratifying. During the past year I’ve also noticed a pattern to the questions and [...]

I don’t like to promote (directly or indirectly) the stereotypes in the popular culture about how men and women communicate differently. I approach communication style differences based on the individual, not the sex. Because I have addressed this in other posts, I won’t get into it here, except to say that looking at the interpersonal/intrapersonal [...]

The foundation of your communication style is directly related to your inherent abilities—the way you are wired. Yet there is more to it. Relationships influence how we use our style. Recently I had a question in the Communication Lab, bringing focus to this issue. The questioner indicated that both he and his wife have dominant [...]

Jonah runs a non-profit, community development organization. He is very enthusiastic about his job, likes the people he works with, and is motivated to bring the organization to a higher level. His management team consists of an assistant director, administrative assistant, finance person, research director, outreach director, and development director. They are a congenial group, [...]

Each day, I receive news updates on issues relating to communication. Without fail there is at least one article that refers to the differences between females and males. The articles and blogs are written by people from all walks of life, lay people and professionals of many disciplines. Although I’ve found value in what has [...]

Sam’s wife, Beth, made a simple statement, or so she thought. “Let’s put in a walk-in shower.” Sam was immediately sour on the idea. He grimaced and said it wasn’t a good idea. This upset Beth and she responded strongly. “Why are you always so negative when I make a suggestion?” Sam quickly responded, “Because [...]

A recent question in the Communication Lab prompted the writing of this piece. The questioner was confused about how he “used” the interpersonal and intrapersonal components. He clearly sees himself as intrapersonally oriented, yet with his wife (also strongly intrapersonal), he is more talkative, much more interpersonally driven. Specifically, he initiates most of the let’s-sit-down-and-discuss-this [...]

Willie is a story teller. If you ask him a question, even a simple question, you are likely to get a story. It drives Ellen crazy. “Why can’t he just give a simple answer to a simple question?” she says with exasperation. “If he asks me a direct question, I give a direct answer—yes or [...]

I’ve always talked a lot. Those who knew me as a young child tell stories about how much I loved to talk. When you’re a cute, curly haired three-year old it can be delightful. My son talked a lot, too, and his daughter probably talks more than both of us combined. Fortunately, when I was [...]

“Jeff, wouldn’t it be great to take a trip to Italy to see all that magnificent art?” “Jamie, you know we can’t afford that. You’re always coming up with these expensive ideas that are way out of line with our budget.” I’ve heard this conversation in various forms at least five hundred times in the [...]